Adventures in Cloth Diapering

We went for it.
We made the plunge, we are cloth diapering this baby.
I was a little nervous.
I have some amazing friends who cloth diaper who are showing us the ropes.


We are using Best Bottoms diapers as well as a few BumGenius Freetimes (for night time), and a couple work at home mom diapers. So far..... we love it. Seriously.
We ordered from Nicki's Diapers and they have been marvelous to work with, we have been ordering a few a month since January to build up our stash so that we could spread out our cost so that it wasn't one lump sum all at one time (thanks for the tip Lindy).
I also have a small collection of cloth wipes that we use, I figure if I am doing all the laundry anyways, what is a few wipes in the mix.

We didn't use cloth diapers while Lucy was in the NICU or the first couple days at home, we used up the ones that they gave us and as those were running out we use a newborn cloth diaper rental for the early days when she was still a bit too small for the ones that we owned. Not only are they ridiculously cute but we have other reasons as well......

My reasoning for wanting to do it:

• primarily it is environmentally - I just can't stand the idea of millions of diapers going in the waste when I have beautiful alternatives 
• I don't think I would be doing it if the cloth diapers were still the old school ones like my grandparents used (heck I doubt my grandparents used cloth but that were available when they were diapering my parents and aunts and uncles) - something about a squirming child and having to properly fold a diaper AND then stick pins into said diaper without poking a baby/toddler scares the daylights out of me - so we are going with the snap version of Best Bottoms
• Yes, I know some people still use the prefolds or flat diapers and use the safety pins/diaper pins, but it just isn't for me 
• Yes, I know the Best Bottoms are a little more expensive than the flats or prefolds, but frankly I don't care
• other reasons:
• I hear there are many health benefits for babies who use cloth (I am not anti disposable and we use disposable for sure when we are on vacation most likely because I can't quite fathom how I would make cloth diapers work on vacation - but who knows we'll see how it goes)
• financially - I can't lie the financial side of it did play a slight role in our decision making but wasn't the main reason
• low low reason - seriously how cute are babies in cloth diapers

I am sure as Lucy gets a bit bigger and starts eating real food the challenges to cloth diapering will change, but so far, we love it. The extra laundry really doesn't phase me and the amount of money we are saving as well as the amount of diapers we are keeping out of the landfill warms my heart.

Uncertainty abounds....

Never in my life have I felt more uncertain about what I am doing. SERIOUSLY.

Just the other day after several run ins with church ladies (they are a breed of their own, granted a beloved breed, which you have to love and adore, not to mention I am fairly certain the world is upheld on the prayers of church ladies - yes, there are some theological holes in that argument but bear with me and it's my blog so I can say as I want) telling me what day they were having a baby shower for us (for which I am REALLY thankful since I have bought hardly anything for said baby and we have been focusing on our basement) and having to barter back and forth to get them to realize that if I am not in town (out on a mission trip, on an overnight retreat with kids, or at camp for the week) I cannot attend a baby shower, even if it is my own - they have set a date that will work for a shower. ANNNDDD they gave us a deadline to go register for baby.

Soooo Marc and I walked into the store to just begin to look around - I have been doing a little (emphasis on the word little) research on baby gear/stuff/whatnot and I have some AMAZING friends (seriously, I feel bad for the rest of the world because you all don't have my friends) who have been more than willing to offer advice. So we walked in, we signed up to get a registry (which was quite the fiasco when the system went down and that there already is someone with my exact name registered who is not me and the system taking two of the same name and blah blah blah), they handed us the magical wish list gun (which worked part of the time at best) and we were off - to go walk isle by isle through the baby stuff - semi hoping we wouldn't run into anyone we knew as we were debating what on God's green earth we were suppose to be scanning.

My husband and I found ourselves in two separate places, Marc, loved to scan things - because it was fun. I found myself wrestling with questions like:

• Why do babies need so much stuff?
• Do we REALLY need this?
• Yes, I know some things will in fact be nice to have
• Yes, I know we do need some things
• Does EVERYTHING have to make noise?
• Really I want a huge collection of books for baby
• I want toys that don't have to be plugged in or require 18 size D batteries
• Why is everything pink or blue?
• Do people realize there are billions of colors out there - everything baby related doesn't have to be pink or blue?
• Why do girls only get pink?
• Why do boys only get blue?
• Why always pastels?
• Why is anything that is semi neutral colored yellow and covered in ducks?
• Generations have survived without some of these things - why are they all of a sudden necessary?
• How can I further purge stuff we have in our house because apparently our kid is going to have a ton of stuff? 
• Remind myself never to move again
• Also remind me to clean out and purge stuff as we no longer need them
• Yes, I know I can't get rid of stuff right away (there maybe other children down the road - no promises on birthing them myself but we could adopt - or I could forget how awful I have felt 99% of the time I have been pregnant)

The list went on and on and on. I also found myself more and more thankful for the generations of people before me who survived and managed to keep babies alive despite millions of recalls on products (we were looking up stuff online as we were standing in the store - the internet can be a black hole of information as to what is best). I was thankful for the group of people who are already showering our baby with love and prayers and who are anxious for baby to arrive so that they can hold baby, love on baby, and accompany baby (and Marc and I) through this new path we are on.

We know we still need to edit our list some. The scanner went crappy and we were overwhelmed and drove down the street to get ice cream before heading home. We know there are things on there we can probably take off as soon as we confirm that we are getting a couple things handed down to us (we don't need everything new). We know there are probably things we should add that we just didn't think of - we will get to it, in time.

For now, we are overwhelmed at best. I seriously sent this text to my mother "I have never felt more unprepared or uncertain of what the heck I am doing then while we were just registering for baby stuff and we had no clue where to start or what we will need" as we pulled out of the store. It was true in that moment. Since then, I have calmed down a bit, still totally freaked out and jazzed beyond my wildest imagination - According to the app on my phone - today marks 93 days until baby's due date (yes, I realize it could be earlier than that or it could be weeks later - however, we are 93 days until due date). Also I included a picture of our ridiculously happy puppy who has no clue what is about to rock her world. She always will be my first baby.

Pregnancy

I figured after dropping the news in the last post that I am pregnant I should probably do a bit of an update. Baby Marshall is technically due on August 7, 2014, however I am not holding my breath that baby will actually agree, my fear is it will be the world's hottest summer on record and baby will hold out until an eviction notice is given and baby is forced out of the womb. Bring on the ice cream and the lake.

We found out we were pregnant back in December, actually on the same day that we closed on our new house. It was quite the surprise to us and not at all like we had planned, I feel like this is how these types of things generally work out. We are jazzed for sure.

A selfish downfall is my race schedule is pretty much non-existent for a while with baby coming in August. I still plan on running a couple 5ks but no halfs or even 10ks are on my calendar, which saddens me. I am not really certain I can bank on being able to run all that well this summer so attempting to do something more than a fun 5k sounds awful. Not to mention the treadmill makes me sick, literally. However, I have been swimming a TON of miles. New problem, maternity swim suits that are geared towards lap swimming rather than having your stomach hang out, they are few and far between and generally cost way more than I actually want to spend. Next year, I will be back running for sure. I have convinced Marc to run the Tower of Terror ten miler with me down in Disney world, not this October, but the following (yes, this seems ridiculously far off in the distance, however, I want a fun race on the calendar. I imagine registration will open up in February or so for the race). My parents, who took no arm twisting, agreed to come along on the trip so that someone can hang out with baby while we run.

I will also hopefully have Fargo 2015 under my belt (no commitment to distance yet, perhaps the 10k) and some fun summer runs. This summer is shot. Something about being seven through nine months pregnant and running sounds horrible.

I have been feeling less than ideal to put it mildy. Whoever named it morning sickness was lucky, I would have referred to it as all day and every day sickness and still going strong at this point (Yes, I am well aware it dies off for most people at 12 weeks, I am just extra "lucky" or something. No, the drugs don't do anything for it.) It sucks. I puke more than I care to admit and am at the point that I look at food and think "do I want to puke that back up" before eating it. Ridiculous.

We are excited for August for sure.
Bring on the world's hottest summer (which after this winter is next to impossible to imagine).


Any fun or exciting news in your world?
Life throwing you any curve balls lately?

Welcoming a new decade

Today I enter a new decade of life. Good bye 20s and hello 30s.

My 20s were great. The highlight reel:

• I earned my bachelor's degree
• I earned my masters of divinity
• I was ordained
• I took my first call to full time ministry
• I got married
• I traveled the globe
• met amazing people and heard their stories
• smelled and tasted things beyond my wildest imagination
• took thousands upon thousands (literally) of photographs
• I learned more about myself 
• I ran my first half marathon (and have continued to run them)
• I bought 2 houses and sold 1
• I got my a golden retriever, Dakota
• I got pregnant (yep, you read that right, Baby Marshall is arriving early August 2014)
  

Hopes and Dreams for my 30s: (in no particular order)

• deliver a baby (eeeeeek)
• raise a wonderful child who lives to love and serve God
• Travel the globe
• payoff Marc's student loans
• finish the basement of our house
• go on a sabbatical (after 7 years in ministry at my current ministry site I am allowed a 3 month sabbatical)
• continue to run half marathons
• and other races - and place in the top 3 of my age bracket for some race (yes it can be a small race) - now that I am out of the 18-29 age bracket (seriously, how is that age bracket fair to those of us in the upper part of that bracket) it seems like this goal may actually be do able
• Grow in my photography skills 
• also in my photoshop/lightroom abilities
• live in the moment more often
• and live simply
•  keep up on my shutterfly books - I love looking through them when they are finished 
• read lots and lots of books
• crochet beautiful things

This list is only the beginning, as life always goes, we have NO CLUE what we are doing. However, I look forward to the years to come, good-bye twenties, you were good to me for sure. Hello, thirties, bring on the adventures.

"O God, you have called your servants to ventures of which we cannot see the ending, by paths as yet untrodden, through perils unknown. Give us faith to go out with good courage, not knowing where we go, but only that your hand is leading us and your love supporting us; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen." (ELW pg 304)

Give me a break people......

Seriously. I get married in about a month and a half. I am not married yet.
I am already annoyed by the number of kids who have said anything along this line:

• Will you have a kid by next year at this time?


• Are you ready to give up alcohol for 9 months?


• How will being pregnant effect your race calendar?


• Are you going to even bother with birth control or just get pregnant right away?


• blah blah blah - have a baby - blah blah blah

I know people are very excited for us to be getting married and I know people love babies and I know people are trying to be helpful and want to be a part of this next phase in my life but seriously - stop pushing people.

Currently I have the world's cutest puppy (at least in my eyes) and for the moment she is more than plenty to handle. There is absolutely no, zero, zilch reason to have my own kid. Currently I am savoring: sleep, being able to pick up and go whenever and wherever I want, sleep, freedom, and being engaged and transitioning to being married. [yes I am aware that lots of these things are selfish however, reasons are what they are and I am jazzed to use them for a while yet].

Overwhelmed with life.

It is ridiculously rough to be my dog.
I include this picture just because I think it is hilarious
how she is sleeping on the chair. I LOVE my sweet puppy.

Seriously. I don't know what it is that has put me over the edge but I am there and Lent is just beginning.

I feel like I have 12,000 things going at once and all of the things are happening simultaneously. All good things, but 12,000 of them at once. This post is a venting post.

Life at church:

• Ash Wednesday is tomorrow
• My colleague has a flight to Hawaii for 3 weeks starting this weekend
• 7th & 8th grade retreat Friday night
• Leadership retreat Sunday afternoon/evening
• it's Lent (enough said)

Life outside of church:

• Miscellaneous projects that occupy my life
• I became a co-director of a camp here in town with a friend and seriously it hasn't been updated in about 15 years and massively needs it to bring it back up to code - seriously who doesn't keep a camp up to code - will be amazing when it is finished
• Swimming lessons - I actually really enjoy teaching swimming lessons about 98% of the time despite the fact that 70% of the parents drive me batty and assume I am there to cause serious fears and damage to their child in the pool - seriously people getting your kids toes wet won't kill them - you signed them up for swimming lessons not standing next to the pool lessons - take a chill pill

Life at home:

• I am getting married in 4 months and there is so much done and yet it seems like so much to do
• I am officially over the snow, I need to be able to be outside - I want to run outside - I hate treadmills
• My house is never clean - or so it feels
• I feel like I have 15 projects going at home for a variety of things and can't manage to get any done
• My dog needs to be able to go for a long run - she is starting to go stir crazy too
• I feel like my house stinks due to a lack of fresh air - I tried opening the window yesterday just to air it out a bit and was freezing cold so had to shut them after about fifteen minutes

Life personally:

• I am annoyed at the 30 minute limits on the cardio machines at the YMCA - how am I suppose to get in a long run in 30 minutes and switching machines is lame [although I am happy that many of the "new years resolution people" are slowly but surely fading out - while I am sad for them they aren't making their goals - I am happy to have some time back on the machines - I am evil and mean apparently]
• I am jazzed about getting married this summer but it feels like there is a lot I need to do before Marc can move in - clean out half my closet, and make space for his stuff somewhere - I must keep purging things and giving them away
• I want a floo network [as in Harry Potter] so all of my friends can quickly and easily get together - I could use a good hangout with some of my favorite people. Not to mention I would love to be able to meet up with my family more frequently. I hate that my call is so far away from friends and family. 
• I am saddened that I don't know when my next vacation is or where I will go
• I wish when the schools in town got a snow day it meant that adults did too [although that wouldn't help with getting my massive to-do list done]
• I have been taking a ton of pictures - hence the instagram explosion on the right - and I have had the chance to take a ton of pictures with my "nice camera" of different mostly church related events and it has been wonderful - I feel like I have already shot about 5,000 photos this year which is close to catching up to last years measly amount. I dare to even say there has been at least 10 decent ones. Whoop Whoop.
• I got a new (technically 2nd) cousin this week! I can't wait to meet her - I need to figure out a way to get home to meet her. From the pictures my cousin has been texting me she is beautiful! [another good reason for the floo network]

Call Perks

One of the perks of my call is that occasionally I get to help lead worship at a local nursing home. (The clergy in the area all rotate through the nursing homes in this area, we have several nursing homes we get to help lead worship.) Today is one of those days that I get to lead worship with the older folks. Now generally it is not in my call to come alongside the older generations. My primary focus is children, youth, and family ministries, which I LOVE. Seriously, I am over the top blessed to be able to have the call I have. However sometimes I do enjoy the chance to lead worship at the nursing home.

I love the wisdom and the pure enthusiasm of the folks gathered at the nursing home. They are genuinely excited to be in worship and to receive communion. Some of these folks have fading memory and do not always remember what is going on or where they are but there is something outstanding that happens when they gather for worship, some how the Holy Spirit works and moves and they always seem to remember The Lord's Pray, Amazing Grace, How Great Thou Art, and other classics. Most of them can also still recite the Apostle's Creed without any hesitation. It is humbling to worship alongside these folks and to bear witness to their testimony of our wonderful God.

I enjoy taking some of my high schoolers and junior high kids with me when I go, occasionally we even have a family or three join us. If someone brings a baby they are always passed around from one person to the next and smothered in love. We are to the point that the youth also look forward to sitting next to these folks in worship, while these aren't their grandparents they have a deep respect for those in this particular nursing home. They have developed favorites and everyone has a buddy. I love the chance for mutual ministry, the older folks love seeing the younger youth and the youth love to spend time with their elders. Both the youth and the elders love to share stories and be in one another's presence.

Thanks be to God for the ways in which God calls us to walk alongside one another and to value each and every person.

Letter

Dear Swimming Lessons Parent,
   Thank you for trusting me to teach your child to swim, he is a great kid for sure and I am enjoying my time with him. I know he is your oldest child and you haven't had kids in swimming lessons before, you are a great mom for putting him in swimming lessons. I truly believe all kids should learn to swim as it is a life saving skill. I know he one of your most priceless treasures and you are allowing me to take him into what has the potential of being a dangerous situation, but trust me, I've done this before, with the same honor you give me hundreds (after 13 years of teaching swimming lessons I may even be to the thousands by now) of other parents have trusted me with their most precious gift. I know you are nervous and so is your son, he feeds off of your nerves. I know he is very important to you, I recognize that, I also know that he is a beginning swimmer so I keep my eyes on him all of the time.
    Please remember that you did enroll him in swimming lessons, so his swimming skills can advance, please don't hold him back, it isn't help for you to need to wipe his eyes every time I challenge him to blow bubbles in the water, or check if he needs to use the bathroom every other minute, he's old enough to tell you when he needs to go (and let's be honest, he wouldn't be the first or the last kid to pee in the pool). Yes, I know he won't be Michael Phelps when we are done with this eight week session however after three weeks I am already seeing his skills advance, trust me, pushing him a little to do things like: get his face wet, put his head underwater, blow bubbles, and float (with my assistance) won't ruin him for the rest of his life. Watch the way he smiles when he accomplishes a task, when he successfully puts his head all the way underwater he comes up in excitement with a smile going from ear to ear and says "did it, I did it, watch me again!" He is having fun, I am not pushing him too hard, he isn't crying, he'll be just fine if he gets water in his eyes and mouth, and while I think it's gross when kids pee in the pool, if he does it'll be just fine.
   Please sit back and move away from the edge of the pool during swimming lessons, enjoy the benches that are there for you to sit on. Remember the conversations that we have had, remember we have talked about this several times already. Please snuggle your baby for a few moments knowing that your oldest won't be interrupting you. Or if you don't want to take the baby out of the car seat, enjoy a good book, relax, play in your iPhone, space out, dream, pray, hope, and while you enjoy a half hour without a four year old needing your undivided attention, trust me. If I need anything or he needs anything you are there, and I am thankful that you care enough to cheer on your kid, to enroll him in swimming lessons, to come and watch him, but please let me do my job.
Peace-
  your son's swimming lessons instructor

I love my call.

   I will admit that there are days in which I wrestle with if I should be an associate pastor of children youth and family ministries or a youth director. Eventually I always come back to the fact that I LOVE MY CALL. I love the people I work with and I can't fathom not being a pastor because I love baptizing and presiding at the table. This is from a baptism a couple weeks ago, he was a precious little guy! I love my call and I give thanks and praise to God.