Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Christmas Tree

I love this time of year, setting up the Christmas tree, decorating the house, playing copious amounts of Christmas music, and baking. Last night Marc and I set up a Christmas tree in my house. Marc lives a block down the street (literally, I can see his lower level apartment from my house) and spends a lot of time at my house, I have his tv in fact because he hated how tiny my tv is. We watch tv/movies/play wii at my house most of the time because I have cable, a fenced in yard, and a couch.

This year we decided to only set up a Christmas tree at my place (partially because we only wanted to buy one and partially because really other than sleeping Marc is usually at my place if not at work) and it was an interesting process. I forget that every family has its own personalities and everyone has their own way of doing things. Marc grew up with a packed Christmas tree, he would fill the tree from top to bottom with ornaments if it was up to him. I grew up with fewer ornaments on the tree, we each picked out some of our favorites and put them on the tree. It was one of those moments last night as we both had to figure out what we would do together, it was a moment of compromise where we realized we need to think about both of us. It was a moment that neither of us anticipated, it was a moment that challenged us (while it seems like a small thing we both had ideas about what a Christmas tree should look like).

These are the things that no one tells you about when you are getting married, about the strange compromises that we make, about the things that matter to you both that don't jive together, the things that cause us to sit and pause and tell stories of why what we believe is important. It is in these moments we pause, we listen, we pray, and move forward in compromise.  Being engaged is definitely a learning process for me, and I am really learning to appreciate the importance of the engagement period. We are learning about each other, about us as a couple, and about ourselves. I am thankful for this time where we still live separately and are learning how to come together. I am thankful for family and friends who support us in this journey and the God who continues to breathe life into us and call us into community with others.

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